Rising Lights...

2009-10-15T09:06:00.001-07:00

moved to: http://inmaginez.livejournal.com/ haha

field camp

2009-05-08T09:50:00.000-07:00

back from field camp.
falcon attracts rain or something.
it rained without fail everday consecutively for 6 days!!!
its always a joy when it rains as it washes everything away..
but next come the mud and humidity. that is total .!@$@##@^@^@!
and from a green number4 it seems like we are troops back from operation desert storm. with mud everywhere and wet pants, shirts smelly helmet and boots..l
to be continued. still got ns stuff to write. omg!

on another note i survived field camp despite being sick. =P personal achievement! a hard-earned victory. =)

countdown

2009-04-02T08:29:00.000-07:00

10 more days..
to the overseas trip
where everyone looks almost the same.
do the same things
get dirty together
eat together
march together

where the outside world cant touch us
and we are slowly shaped
to be...

i dunno that wld be filled in after i'm out...

放了爱，为了爱

2009-03-27T08:26:00.000-07:00

steel my heart
bury what's left
act nonchalent
push u away
let no tears bother u again.
from a distance
like a silent angel
ready to help
when called upon
and disappearing after that..

poem! haha
and this is a nice song. gotta admit it..

你指向远方爱情很晴朗
笑问不如今后就我们俩
怕泪会反光钻进你的胸膛
但那不是感动是泪无法储藏

把美梦锁上以为是天堂
羽翼折起在你身边静静躺
却只能用目光在空中翱翔
还得乔装安份靠在你肩膀

放了爱为了爱
这不是我该怎么生活
放了爱

你说你喜欢我笑得开朗
你越温柔我越不想撒谎
我已办不到你想要的那样
客气地配合你我感觉更勉强

别人的幸福何必要模仿
心不在何苦留躯壳在身旁
加满自由我要无重量飞翔
就算以分离收场

放了爱为了爱
这不是我该怎么生活
放了爱会明白
有种拥有叫做放手

我的心为爱流离失
所紧握最后回家的线索
等到寻获真正的我
证明我决定没有错

放了爱为了爱
这不是我想要的生活
放了爱你会明白
有种拥有叫做放手
放了爱

looking back

2009-03-23T08:59:00.000-07:00

looking back at my past posts..
i'm shocked at how much i've forgotten
am glad that i kept a blog since that.
not minding the twit language used.
that was me. in the past. haha
its what gave me the memories I had.

but some memories retain.. and i still love the words mrs tan's gave us..

"Do all the good you can. By all the means you can. In all the ways you can. In all the places you can. At all the ways you can. In all the places you can. At all the times you can. To all the people you can. As long as ever you can"

"Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” --- Benjamin Franklin

How did i remember them last time?! hopefully i would always remember them. maybe that's why its good to have a blog/diary. Till now I still miss my sec sch days. my science, maths, humanities teachers.

the passion with which they teach.
the care they show.
the friendliness they exude.
the confidence they gave us.
the teachings they passed on to us.
not only those in words
but of heart and moral...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
let us discover more about ourselves without forgetting ourselves.

injury list

2009-02-13T20:49:00.000-08:00

another seemingly permanent injury to add to the left wrist left knee.
right feet. might be due to the long hours of standing and
then bballing at night =P

ah well it would get better one day i guess. just need to rest abit.
shall sleep sunday away if i can! haha

S.I.M. review( if joel's that bored to come here): luckily din get burnt, but the timing was off abit and wasn't chased off by security. haha but the surprise and the look given is reward enough. anyway, seriously need to find otu mroe abt that 'black bird' thingy and the _ _ party set. maybe we go create one ourselves. haha

hard work

2009-02-08T07:02:00.000-08:00

after staring and fiddling around for 1h...finally succeeded! at least its close to the intended effect

and it got really hot hot hot. haha my fingers were nearly..............

only joel will know for now bah. LOL

in the end din get to bball today cos of the sky.

was wandering around amk today when we got 'picked up' by J&J

changed plans to go visit Vjay. haha good news is she looks fine! but can see that she's still abit stressed and worried. but nvrmind at least she knows that help is always around her! =D

oh no i realised i din run at all this week! need to schedule my days properly and determination! =)

.....

2009-02-05T06:59:00.000-08:00

a random post that came to mind. =)

words are not important
they only make matters worse.
,./,./ .///,./,,... ,././/,./,.,/,., ,,./,./,...,,,,.//./.,/.,,/, //// //// //..,/ ,/,/.
its the feelings behind them them that matters and the feelings they generate to listeners
and that's where msn fails
words are empty and filled with the receipient's thoughts.
and things get ugly.
eyes get red
while tears fall freely
but words deny the latter's happening.
lest it brings more hurt and anger to others.
for blame he does not on other
but himself.
for being stupid and weak.

but words arn't of help now
for his nemesis may have just come true
what he taught may be used upon him.

now let's pray that these are just words of a moment
that wont last but for a second
that it wont stay true when the sky blue day arrives. =)

and hope we must for without it we have nothing else.

thoughts

2009-01-11T06:50:00.000-08:00

A to-do list-
1)getting back my fitness
2)start my trainings on:
hypnosis
magic
bball
squash
3) learning music and dance
and that's my three objectives. meaning which i need discipline! (and thick skin)

stoned

2009-01-10T22:16:00.001-08:00

i'm seriosuly stoned.
why is the bball court unavailable again.
cant they put the counters for the bursary award in the shelter at the side of the hall!?

now there ain't any court where there are ppl playing.
the other court nearer to my house is empty too. rahhh.
and almost everyone's either in army, attached, going to be or trying to be.
that leaves like near zero people to ask them out!
teh remaining one dun even respond to your smses till its too late.
if only i enlist in january. so much better.

but life wont be as boring if there's an available court with people playing to go to!
and i dont wanna travel all the way to sengkang. cos nobody available to ask to go there to play!
infuriating.
and i just 'sent' my bedsheet covers for washing...

if the afternoon gets any worse, guess i might just have to go there and try my luck?
on a more frustrating note. i haven't run for 1 month already!

maybe i shld get on with that forgotten plan of being a hermit. =)
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

sometimes we think too much
on a question where there's no answer.
for the question comes from emotions itself
and not a rational mind.
but we seek still the answer
for fear of getting hurt
if we dont find one;
hence leaving a blemish
that stains our life.

the middle

2009-01-04T07:00:00.000-08:00

the player's on shuffle
an old song came to play........

The Middle
Hey,Don't write yourself off yet.
It's only in your head you feel left out,
Or looked down on.
Just try your best,
Try everything you can.
And don't you worry what they tell themselves
When you're away

[Chorus]
It just takes some time,
Little girl, you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine,
Everything, everything will be alright. (alright)

Hey,You know they're all the same.
You know you're doing better on your own, (on your own)
So don't buy in.
Live right now.
Yeah, just be yourself.
It doesn't matter if it's good enough (good enough)
For someone else.

.............and its one hell of a catchy song

guess

2009-01-03T02:00:00.000-08:00

da da da da da
dada dada da
dada da da da dada

alright what song am i humming tunelessly to?
any guesses? hahaa

okay , my new status. i'm swinging like a pendulum from the halfway mark to 3/4 mark of GJH's resolution( the one revealed at suki sushi =p).
and wx and wc we are not crazy okay! just pragmatic =)

2009

2009-01-01T03:40:00.000-08:00

suddenly, it seems like just another day.

just proves the fact that the process is of more importance than the destination

nothing would make sense;

the things we do

unless we live the moment

and experience what there is to be.

but am feeling listless.
wish i have sufficient money
so i can just sit by
and watch the world pass by.
even for a few weeks.

that being said.
also wanna bball and squash the whole day round!

nuaing

2008-12-28T06:25:00.000-08:00

'nuaing' aint good for health.
gg for a sumptuous (i think hte spellign is wrong here) dinner without exercising for one whole week
is DISASTROUS.
and i realised i've not attended any of the sats run.
DIE le la.
there goes the plan to get back into shape.

one more lousy fact i found out today.
i cant touch the board. but nigel seah can!!!
this is totally sianed.
right need to be focused liao.
no more nuaing. (i hope)

there's this urge to cut botak despite NS being 3-4 months from now.
another result of too much nuaing.
and no more early mornings aka late night aka 2-4AM

btw, i'm quite amazed you are still reading up till now!

i guess i need to get a phone with good camera function.
after NS. lol
and shld i get itouch or psp or just mp3?
and what non-camera phone to buy?
dun intend to spend much on that though!
$$ a constraint. sadly but truely.

omg. its playing would you mind now!
signal to go off liao.
a rather meaningless song.

addiction.

2008-12-25T05:55:00.000-08:00

why did i reread the lord of the rings?
made me stuck in my room for the whole day except for lunch and dinner.
only managed to drag myself out now.

somehow, despite it being a fantasy story.
still drawn towards it. bahh and i still have 2 more books to complete.
after finishing the hobbit and book1!

3d2n

2008-12-24T04:21:00.000-08:00

back from sjab camp.
feeling conked out despite sleeping for 3-4 hours alr.
darnn!
never bball if u din sleep the day before.
and it rained the whole day for today.
but it still haven snow! (wl's prediction)
lol

was great to see so many generations of sjab gathered on campfire night.
and many thanks to rosalind's brother for the flying fire fox thingy! haha

_______________________________________
reminded of this quote in andss:
" i hear and i forget. i see and i remember. i do and i understand" Confucius

need to let them learn.
but need to understand why they have to.
to find that passion
and the resolve
to make thyself a stronger person
to push thy limits
through all these
and from there have fond memories to look back upon
to know that you've been apart of a legacy
that is still and will go strong.

we need to have a sense of responsibility
for the chocies we have made.
since we are in it
might as well get it done right

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
sometimes the things we wanna say
just come out wrong.
thus, it results in misunderstanding
esp' when its a one way thing
when one is afraid of the other.

==========================================
dont feel like going out.
but staying home
rereading all those novels.
just too lazy to go the the library
and i know i shld be getting other things done.
but it feels as if i've not taken a true blue rest
whereby i just laze at home.
doing nothing.

but that's time a wasting
in this short span of life
where we have an even shorter period to enjoy extreme stuff
that requires vigour and a lil bit of recklessness. =)
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
alright, merry christmas everyone!

one word

2008-12-20T08:12:00.000-08:00

one word summarises today. shuang!
well except the trip to sembawang, contemplating what to do afterwards.
cos some ppl like weird timings.

ok la its weird to me cos wanted to bball today. whaah
which bring me to the word. shuang!

so basically bballed from 1 plus to 7 then continued around 8 plus to near 10. haha
met jono for the night one.
random ppl + and jnrs for the afternoon one.
ohwells it was fun.
but the legs are complaining now. haha

surprisingly, they din cramp today.
hav they given up protesting?
grown stronger?
or the lull before a storm?

okay so the plan to psycho arthur to intro me to gym training is scrapped.
or else my legs might just be gone by monday, 0000.
spam magic, guitar (depends on sis), MONK tmr.

ppls let me get a job. dun wanna waste my 3 months away.

mara-training

2008-12-19T06:16:00.000-08:00

hopefully, the sky would be kind tmr.
cos it wld be like a mara' training from 8 to 7. haha with breaks in between of cos.

need to get back into shape and then beyond.
before the heavy 19s come crashing down on me.
resolve. willpower! haha

rants

2008-12-17T06:14:00.000-08:00

ran to jenn's house to pass her her very belated present form joel and me. haha
die le la. my stamina is at a all time low! and how am i gg to challenge the j1 squashers now?

then bballed. darn the sprained pinky has not totally recover yet. how???
and i still cant touch the rim yet.

and the worst thing ever said to me today. "is not you jump not high enough. u jump quite high already. is u not tall enough"
wah. sian.

ohwells. 30 inches. here i come.

wahahha interview tmr. hopefully it would be a breeze. lol

past two days

2008-12-13T06:33:00.000-08:00

alrights, had 4/7 gathering yesternight. lol jap meal. well it was not bad.
just that i dun like to eat salad and dunno what the sauces are for! haha
hten went arcade and sat down. chit-chat for a while before heading home.
darn, we're all getting older. and looking so too! =(

now for today, bballed from 1 plus to 7 plus.
result? a sprained pinky, aching legs
and for some weird reason...a headache!
and somehow i sprained my foot.
tis' so weird!

i should get a house by the beach
and another by a meadow.
ohwells wishful thinking in s'pore.

words

2008-12-10T09:19:00.000-08:00

words and tone are powerful things.
time shld be spent on learning how to use them man.
can be used to influence and motivate to one's purpose
so we shld all learn its purposes to better defend ourselves.
but that wld mean sales person wld have trouble handling me now. hahaha
hypnosis and mentalism rocks man.
but they are oh so hard to master.
easy ot understand hard to use.
darnn.
any mentors out there????

i need to 'settle' down. get a job and start planning
my training schedule for bball, squash and run more then
start dropping by to train the juniors more regularly...

btw, some 'cool' phrases to use.
never assume for it only makes an ASS out of U and ME.
learning to kiss is good- Keeping It Short and Simple

but these words seem familiar, heard of them in those inspirational or leadership training workshops i guess.
these things just get recycled la.
but we forget abt them.
-------------------------------------
random though: shld i learn to be proficient with microsoft excel with my spare time online?

tired

2008-12-05T07:37:00.000-08:00

rectangle
e l
c g
t n
a a
n t
g c
l e
elgnatcer

lazy to type out my thoughts.
needa wake up early tmr agaain. wah sian diao la... haha

heys

2008-12-03T14:02:00.001-08:00

wah sian today damn suay.
kena saboed by xiu qi
to make fun of myself in front of half the school cohort and teachers. -_-

ohwells maybe i can be paid for that...

2008-12-02T02:50:00.000-08:00

what kind of a lousy friend am i
not being able to help
watching my greatest fears realise.
and still be at a lost...
there's nth i can do
or say which would help

if only there's a time machine....
maybe that's what i hafta do.
to turn back time

or maybe its just myself
interfereing when help's uncalled for.

i'm at a lost.

---------=
anyway, guys are total jerks.
mein gott
the atrocities commmitted
taking advantage when someone's down
to serve ur very own needs and wants
just because u lack discipline
and a streak of deceny within
freaking big bumbling baboon

maybe there's indeed truth in rumours
esp those that circulate out of the sch.

--------------------------------------
now that was a total stereotype but i cant be bothered for now.
till next time then.
suddenly the mod for prom and magic's gone.
shld have ran with mao

back

2008-11-26T04:35:00.000-08:00

back from class chalet!

it was.

met friends from other classes/sch

picking up pool where i left it around 6 mths to 12 mths ago.

shui cheng's imaginary ball method works! but sadly not if u want to spin the ball.

ok zoning out and there's bball in the morning tmrw somemore.

dead........ haha

listen

2008-11-23T09:24:00.000-08:00

it feels good to look thru pictures with the music playing.
contemplation.
thoughts running
memories revisited
amplified by the music
in the background.
i shld invest in an mp3 player i guess
and an amplifier!

lost

2008-11-23T04:59:00.000-08:00

suddenly i'm at a lost.
i need a plan on what i want to learn
and how to achieve them
but the list's neverending
and resources limited.

told my friend to reformat comp since its suspecetd to be infected.
now it seems mine might be clogged up with adwares and spywares
takes frigging long to load!

and i think i need to learn how to upload pics and take pics.
and maybe jsut maybe change the blog skin

a's

2008-11-18T06:13:00.000-08:00

!yadot repap tsal
and no i'm not feeling bored so i'm doing this
............taht tsuj
okay this is getting tiring.
what i wanted to say is

before we all jump into celebrating.
maybe just MAYBE we should all stop.
and think abt our live for the past few years
the things we have achieved and done
things we've regretted doing.
what we want to do in the future..
how we are going to do it.

spend a few days doing nothing and thinking abt nothing
just watching teh world flow by.
i mean we wu get thsi chance anytiem soon already rgt.
with all the post A level activities we've planned!

btw, anybody have the song singderella?

shit

2008-10-25T07:06:00.003-07:00

great i'm down with a fever.
striking from nowhere
in the afternoon

shit

2008-10-25T07:06:00.001-07:00

great i'm down with a fever.
striking from nowhere
in the afternoon

2 weeks

2008-10-20T06:16:00.000-07:00

2 weeks/ 14 days left.
the pressure's building
but the work done is on me and not me on the system.
so work done by me is like negative? oh s***S!

alrights jia you ba conquer it all
mind over matter.
willpower! haha

contrasting pairs

2008-10-18T07:32:00.000-07:00

good news! i got back my phone! whahaaa
and the person attending to me is the same. the one who said i look like 20+...
RAH

but the bad thing is
i dunno how many time's i repeated my phone crashed! already. my fingers and brain is like totally zombified by those words already la.maybe i'm putting myself into a light trance using those words again and again.

i shall back up my contacts next time if that can be done. and i need to go all the way to paragon to change my sim to the 1000 one.... darnn

at least i woke up and went to run in the morning. totally proving my mum's prediction wrong! haha

dear dear phone

2008-10-14T08:50:00.000-07:00

you were pretty and bright
when i first set my eyes on you...
so pretty
full of energy and promises.
with a prominent voice you drown out the rest
a beacon of light you are when i'm lost in the dark
waking me when you've been asked to
you knew my thoughts and things that happened
as we shared news together
be it day or night...
you've been through happiness, anxiety, sad ness and anger
but you went on with me.
and recently you had a change in make up
and there was the 'new' you.
but this have to happen
you have to back out at this moment
when A's are coming.
what am i to do without you?
my dear W550.... =(

SHOULD BE

2008-10-13T07:15:00.000-07:00

you know that you should be worried when you still cant write coherent answers for prelim explanation questions
and you are stressed up about it when you are blasting songs whilst staring at your 16 inch screen
but seem carefree since you have the time to type all this.

sunday

2008-10-12T06:26:00.000-07:00

every sunday seems like a sunday wasted
esp with the waking-up late routine
and then off for a 2h lunch
to reach home tired
attempting to stud for an hour max
and dying peacfully on my bed till 7pm
whereby dinner's ready
and its in front of this 16 inch screen ( i cant believed i measured them!)
and the 29 inch one later.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
at least i read some newspaper.
to find that i dont remember much afterwards, except there's a company called FreePort, akafuku and Mikasa food.
if you nv heard of the last two u haven been reading the newspaper! (the september editions one anyway)

now, if you have been reading and looking up till now, you owuld know how diligent i'm in reading my papers =)
alright 29" here i come!

last day

2008-10-10T07:00:00.000-07:00

Final day of sch today.
the feeling is just weird. unlike sec sch.
mixture of relief, happiness and a tinge of sadness.

Relieved that we have finaly graduated.
happy that we have survived HALF of JC life.
sad that there's not much sweet memories to keep
well at elast there were friendships forged.
horizon expanded
limits tested

there's seriously a whole spectrum of people out there
whose perceptions may vary a whole universe away from yours (aka alien and weird by your own standards)
but that's that.
its the environment they grew up in.
values they were inculcated
and subsequent choices they made.

there were many words i said that were regretful
childish actions.
but at least I learn the impact they have on people
and on myself.
learn to filter out information that wont meant for you.
just accept the criticisms and bias words.
change for the better if they are true
be nonchalent if they are not.

I learn also that if you really wanna have a strong class spirit..
you have to reach out to those who are more individualised.
you have to take the extra step to achieve what you seek.
and not depend on the class leaders
for even they have their limits and problems to deal with.
always strive to be more
more than what you are.
but also the other leaders must have similar motivation
and not just be concerned only when within their job scope.

haiz what can i say...
we all did wrong in our ways
at least let's not repeat it again...

now for squash.
should have push the other members harder and not just let them be.
we could really achieve more than what we did.
just had to be more firm with them
Heck the idea that its a sports cca and not a uniform group.
to achieve our goal we have to believe and be disciplined
so when the latter's lacking, it has to be enforced.
advices given are only for consideration and not to be followed entirely.
nvrmind, would put hope into this batch of juniors.
seriously hope they would start training hard now and not play a fool!

at least learn another thing.
when discipline is not enforced strictly (as in UG)
and people are just not motivated themselves.
more proactive actions need to be taken
direct and subtle ones.
shall read up more on that after A's.

anyway, we hav a half successful class outing which become 36% successful later.
Point learnt:
be very detailed in your instructions. tell people to make their whole day free! and it would help if leaders are showing an example and not running off halfway...
or be influenced by their peers.
sometimes i think were the wrong people chosen in year one?
and should we have gone ahead with the idea to change,
when we felt it should be done.
veracity is important.
i guess its too late for me to show this aspect now? hahaa

but also like ms ewe said..people should just voice their opinion when asked
and not complain and disagree when everything is settled afterwards and gonna be carried out.
it only complicates matter.
if u wanna appear peaceful,
then do it not say it.
KEEP YOUR PEACE.

btw, i thought it was common knowledge that sakae buffet starts at 3pm?
and i did rememebr someone saying that it will start at 3 when we agree on it but i guessed everyone just din listen properly? WELL.
think i would get lots of emotions boiling here.
but i need to mention it.
ms ewe asked what we wanted to say to the class.
the only good point i can think of is: we are generally peaceful and don't create much trouble.

anyways, think i know why the topic was brought up to be discussed again but shall not mention why. and no. its not only sis but somethingelse too. haha. like i said, was the right choice made? lol it din seem like a big issue at that time anyways.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
on a good note,
bballed at night today.
though i got scratched again
but it was quite fun. esp when they are taller and.... haha! (die, ego at work here!!!)
esp after the buffet.
i'm not gonna force myself to gorge at sakae next time to make ti mroe worthwhile.
and zhou yang shall not sit inside
lest he spam on the comp again!

runnnnnn

2008-10-05T05:05:00.000-07:00

back from run with mao!
from amk st52 to yio chu kang road then to ave 3 i think then back to st 52. lol
wanted to do a loop into jalan kayu de but then running out of energy le so we just skipped it.
estimated distance >9.4km.
but our timing is quite horrendous. measley 57mins.
nvrminds. we would train harder after A's
think i'm gonna be more tired during post A's then pre A's la.

went to the fitness corner for a while. and realised i injured my right shoulder.
but it shld be minor la.
SHLD get better after a few days. haha
next time it would be to bishan park. wahaha
and i realised we have yet to do the yishun/sembawang route!
(and we had wanted to complete that route since last year -_-")

now i'm just conked out would be great to just lie down and stone. but not that tired till i wanna sleep.
must be the adrenaline.
and good old mao kun is back to mugging physics. haha

words travel fast. perceptions mutates even faster

2008-10-05T00:49:00.000-07:00

sometimes is scary what others can say
or choose to see
and then interprete
here's a problem of imperfect information.

and things get worse
when imperfect info is put together with what seems to be.
a perception is formed.
and spread
with 'evidences' as back-up it would seem beyond doubt

alas, would have to take comfort with it.
not like it din happen before.
just that this time it's beneath the radar.
an undercurrent.

am supposed to be doing gp compre now!
but i'm feeling conked out.

ate too much yester-night.
gonna run later hopefully?
and i'm not going to try milk-prata.

good to see the juniors still together.
hopefully they would put up an even stronger fight next year
and top 4 wld be ours.

TBC later.........

gibberish

2008-10-03T05:42:00.000-07:00

i'm typing gibberish
for the uber-rich
to fill me with crisp notes
fresh from the oven
or adding zeroes to those in my bank account.

do we seek to perform
for ourselves or others?
to show feats
other thought impossible
is it to impress
or bring laughter
a celebration of the human abilities.

do we over-think about the need for existence
or is it just an excuse to convince that we are better than animals
but deep inside its just our pride that needs the confirmation.

we seek to break boundaries
is that driven by boredom
or to search for a meaning to life?

now, that i've gotten these out.
its time to really focus on A's.
survival's a primal instinct after all right
and this fight with A's is a fight we've gotta win.
for it's a to the death thing...
at least in s'porean context (most of us anyway)

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
let neither laziness nor distractions be my stumbling block
there's a point to prove
goals to be achieved
dreams to realise.
show the world what you're capable of.
let nothing impede it
let it shine through
or it may never be able to again.

freak

2008-09-30T21:11:00.000-07:00

knew they would complain la...
and now i shall not relax eh
just mug throughout till i fall sick like 'O's
that wld be the best huh.
come on man,
they shld know by now i cant/dont mug throughout the whole time
even if tmr's the paper!
and stop basking in ur past glories
if u consider them to be so
BAH!

and now i'm gonna have to ps joel. WTH.

so magic gonna be on hiatus for like...hmm...1 day?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
to succeed, spend less time on spiting ur enemies but building on your fortress.

focus!

2008-09-29T06:18:00.000-07:00

oh yeah maybe gonna run on wed morning!
hopefully both mao and i wont die halfway!
need to study hard liao...
oh god how can my results be this its equivilant to suicide!
shits! (pardon the language)

so do we have pe or not tmr???

hocus pocus focus
mugging studying for A's

make no sense

2008-09-25T06:16:00.000-07:00

would it be better if
we learn how to appreciate
than to understand?
understanding isn't the key to peace
but appreciation and tolerance.

i know i'm going to regret what i said at KFC today
when i think back about it one day
but seriously.
can't stand it. =p

but then we still in the teenage years soon it would be gone
time to be all childish before we have to peel it away and leave it behind...
nothing more than memories...

its not the worst

2008-09-24T06:49:00.000-07:00

sometimes when you think you've been through it all...
think again.
when you think u've faced the worst.
look again.
around.
anywhere.
For that would not be the worst.
take solace in that.
live your life again
(try at least for her/his sake)
so others can move on too
and not worry for you.

+++++++++++++++++++++++
that being said....
who cares when its happening to you!

on another note, i din know s'pore banned so many songs before
and its cos of the lyrics. -_-

i need a superbrain to memorise everything...

say with me

2008-09-23T06:49:00.000-07:00

say with me
secondhand serenade!
hahas

submerge in the sounds
and listen
stop all thoughts
and just lay down there
let it all flash by
and images flow
to one mixture of blurred thoughts and sounds
and then sink in deeper
to the quiet core
where u lie afloat in nothingness
and memories starts appearing..
finally pick urself up
and come back to the real world.
Afresh.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
to relax is to just lie on the floor
and not feel uncomfortable.
to ignore how dirty your shirt might be
to not to have to wear shoes or the thick sch uniform
which have to be tucked in at all times!

totally random

2008-09-17T06:47:00.000-07:00

on a totally random note.
i know why man's born evil.
the answer's been staring at us all this why.
For Evil livEs.
okay maybe i'm like the last one to realise it
but as the cliche goes "better late than never.."

Campfire burning

2008-09-17T06:12:00.000-07:00

Using the pentium 1 campfire song.... (Campfire's burning... Campfire's burning)

myface's burning
I've got sun burn
it's bugging
irri-tating
what can i do
what shld i do
play till it goes aw-ay

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
NONONONONONO!
i must do well for PRELIMS AND A's!
nno more REPEATS OF PAST FAILURES!
A ALL THE WAY!
study study study study!
but bball is so attractive...

the man who cant be moved

2008-09-16T06:26:00.000-07:00

wonder if there's really such ppl in reality...well i guess there are but not physically but emotionally....
dunno if he's being an idiot or just romantic.
and maybe the girl would just be pissed off with him.
darn life's just so interesting huh!
but how else to show his love?!
nevertheless, one cool sweet song for me currently at least

Going back to the corner where I first saw you,
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag I'm not gonna move,
Got some words on cardboard got your picture in my hand,
Saying if you see this girl can you tell her where I am,
Some try to hand me money they don't understand,
I'm not...broke I'm just a broken hearted man,
I know it makes no sense, but what else can I do,
How can I move on when I'm still in love with you...
Cos if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me,
And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I can be,
Thinking maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet,
And you'd see me waiting for you on the corner of the street.
So I'm not moving... I'm not moving.

Policeman says son you can't stay here,
I said there's someone I'm waiting for if it's a day, a month, a year,
Gotta stand my ground even if it rains or snows,
If she changes her mind this is the first place she will go.

Cos if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me,
And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I can be,
Thinking maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet,
And you'd see me waiting for you on the corner of the street.
So I'm not moving... I'm not moving.
I'm not moving... I'm not moving.

People talk about the guy
Who's waiting on a girl... Oohoohwoo
There are no holes in his shoes
But a big hole in his world...
Hmmmm
and maybe I'll get famous as man who can't be moved,
And maybe you won't mean to but you'll see me on the news,
And you'll come running to the corner...
Cos you'll know it's just for you

I'm the man who can't be moved
I'm the man who can't be moved...

Cos if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me,
And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I can be,
Thinking maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet,
And you'd see me waiting for you on the corner of the street.

So I'm not moving... I'm not moving.
I'm not moving... I'm not moving.

Going back to the corner where I first saw you,
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag not I'm not gonna move.

prelims ended

2008-09-16T05:22:00.000-07:00

finally prelims have ended! it was 4 gruelling weeks of mugging, fear, anxiety, sadness, craziness.
played bball from 11 plus to 3 plus. and i think i've just got sun burn on my face now.
darnn.. and why do ppl go home so earlyyyy?!?!

oh wells i'm having a headache now.
dunno what's wrong too? not enough water??
concussion?

what's happiness?
the little things that make us laugh
or an emotional state where everything is fine and life's good
or issit the moment when u achieve what u set out to get
the moment when u wish time would just stop and stay as what it is?

rahh...headache! why?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!

darn

2008-09-09T06:22:00.001-07:00

thanks to the other 2 from SIM
manipulated, peer pressured me into doing one thing i
have abstained for so long!

and my conjecture was correct anyway.

and econs tmr. die la!

oh no

2008-09-05T07:02:00.000-07:00

we should really stop doing the dare thing....
it would annoy ppl around us... =P
too noisy i guess...

self discipline man!

彩虹

2008-08-30T07:27:00.000-07:00

哪里有彩虹告诉我

能不能把我的愿望还给我

为什么天这么安静

所有的云都跑到我这里

有没有口罩一个给我

释怀说了太多就成真不了

也许时间是一种解药

也是我现在正服下的毒药

看不见你的笑我怎么睡得着

你的声音这么近我却抱不到

没有地球太阳还是会绕

没有理由我也能自己走

你要离开我知道很简单

你说依赖是我们的阻碍

就算放开但能不能别没收我的爱

当作我最后才明白

sis was playing the karoke version
and it just sort of stuck.
been a long time since i've listened to them chinese songs...

and how adept it is? i dunno.
whole body's aching from just 8 times of handstand and approx 6h of bballing.
but its still not enough!!

friday

2008-08-29T05:51:00.001-07:00

wells, it did rained..
i was stunned beyond words
dont know what would be the right words to say.
opportunity never knocks twice i guess.

get to bballed but i still cant get enough of it.
cramp both thighs and calfs
if nto for that would have continued playing!!
sighs, that's the only time when
my mind's focused
on one and only one thing. =)

got to see the juniors and teachers
must say it was heart-warming
but i wont know the next batch of juniors le...
all good things come to an end i guess.
but nothing's absolute!!

sighs but lotsa of teachers have left... =(
that's sad...
haiz

hopefully the future generations of andersonians would be able to do the school proud...
upkeep the good name of the school
in character, competitions and academic results!

weird

2008-08-28T07:12:00.000-07:00

weird...
was going thru my picture folders...
realised i have pics of ppl from juniors to peers to seniors...
unglam to glam.
well it does bring back memories.
sadly there's not much of myself.
so am i an introvert or what? =P

how much have we changed over the past few years?
from the fun-loving, not so mature but QUITE innocent kids
to a 'typical' teenager who thinks himself or herself unique
when we are trapped by the social pressure we help to impose on one another

rambling ramble rambled.
please dont dont rain tomorrow...
u can rain the whole of sat for all i care...

friday break

2008-08-28T06:28:00.000-07:00

gonna take a break tomorrow
let it all out
been waiting for this day all week...
thanks bros and jenn for the past few days man
the constant brain washing upon the emo aura...
hopefully it wun be as hurtful after tmrw..
bball all the way
pool, badminton,
if the sky allow
and my wallet of cos.
not that i'm broke la.

to go back or not
till now there's still the guilt upon returning sch.
the feelings i've let it down
sighs. guess it wld be a downer i'm gonna be stuck with for a time.
when complacency strikes
it catches you off guard..completely

its a deal ze ming...oh man i so need legs training after A's

it hurts

2008-08-26T06:09:00.000-07:00

it hurts to speak to you like that
but that's the only way
to make u feel better for
what you think u have done
then would ur guilt be washed-away
but alas u would never know
cos never would it occur to you that way. =)

and i think i'm seriously dumb for doing that.
guess i'm really weird.

idiot

2008-08-25T07:51:00.000-07:00

ping kee you're such an idiot.
for how many more lessons do you need
to know that all these arn't fated for you
why oh why did u pull down the fences u painstakingly put up
& let thyself be hurt again. (making ur friends worry)
a good friend and confidant u maybe
but never more than that
for you are nv good enough to be.
no matter what friends would say
your fate will prevail
again and again
so learn well from tis
and never fall again
let this be the last lesson
for it wld only be worse the next time round
heed this advice
and lead a hermit's life
for the forest's calling
animals waiting
and earthworms wriggling beneath the soil
aye dont worry my dear dear friends
for my time is near.
with a broken heart
and a tired soul
i would return
to mother nature embrace
where all that have been would be so.
------------------------------------------------------------------------

and the pain's back
only much much worse
with prelims so near
and bball nowhere
running's a no no
for i wld just run into one of them metal things
and hit the headlines
with a bloody splash

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
hopefully i would feel better...
but i think not.
ohwells a hermit's life it would be.
i knew i was suited for it when i told jenn abt it last time.
and i wasn't crazy!
i have this to prove now! =D

random rhymes:
he shoots
he scores
but misses the point

he ran he cried
and was back at that point

as much as it hurts

2008-08-24T03:57:00.000-07:00

as much as it hurts me so
u arn't mine to stay with
for there's always him.
damn, it does hurt so much

why do we always make promises we cant keep
and every night we cant sleep? =(

far away

2008-08-23T07:15:00.000-07:00

there are times when
when promises are nothing
words become meaningless
actions futile.
that's when u know all had failed
and its time to let go.
or not...

Which is worse?
an analytical mind with a heart that dont listen...
an analytical mind with a heart that dont listen and eyes that refuse to see...
an analytical mind with a heart that dont listen and eyes that refuse to see and a stubborn will that refuse to be moved...

its time to let go...
to where her heart truly belongs
where it will feel love it has felt before
and let all that has happened be nothing more than a sweet sweet dream
for familiarity's where the heart feels most comfortable in

like it matters...wont occur to you to view this anyway =)
oh and thanks for friends like jenn joel and shao ming...
or things would have been much much more worse
to curious ppl...just stop asking alrights.
i need a run. 1 serious long run....
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming
you'll be with me
and you'll never go

Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore
On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go

sinusoidal curve

2008-08-17T06:42:00.000-07:00

going up and down
up and down
up and down...
cant it just stay up!?

oh wells congrats S'pore on a silver medal! after 48 years! woohooooooo`
at least there's results now...
one step at a time.
and then stride then maintain.

__________________________
its weird how one person can be so pivotal in one's life
and sth a call is all it takes.

exams

2008-08-15T07:18:00.000-07:00

time's come to buck up
there's just so much at stake.
the promises and hopes
and aspirations
to be the best of what i can be
but i'm still lazing.
seriously need a slap.
but no!
i wld be disciplined.
work work hard!!!
rahh...too bad i dun have an IQ of 180...
hahas

on another note,
blue.............................................
you would know what i want to say =)

_______________________________________
its been a tiring day... two papers in one day, noth of which u haven't study for -_-

thanks

2008-08-13T07:01:00.000-07:00

my squash juniors are so darn ________!
wells, thanks for the pink mouse then.
and no i'm not gonna hang it on my bag.
ain't gay alrights.
but still appreciate the thoughts. haha
wld go abck to train u all if u all need after my A's lol

_____________________________________________
blue erasers and highlighters
- fav words of the day. =)
okay time to study hard for the A's!
something to prove this time
something to achieve
and one great motivation.

back to basics

2008-08-11T06:43:00.000-07:00

Its Back to Basics now.
to be among my loves
music 'studies' bball squash magic!
another new love maybe coming but that would hav to wait till after A's
and depends if they are going to teach. wahaa!

with constancy and purpose
coupled with determination
we'll make it through
to be born anew ready for a new start
and what may come.

accomplishments

2008-08-01T09:32:00.000-07:00

throughout the course of time,
we are continuously trying
to accomplish goals and visions
realising hopes and dreams.
why do we do that?
learning all the various skills
from drawing to singing
dancing to acting
bball to squash
checkers to chess
illusions to magic.
a quest to improve ourselves
to our satisfaction and others?
to give meaning to a life we have yet understand
its purpose of existence?
distracting us from an otherwise seemingly meaningless struggle for survival and dominance?

i guess its just to improve ourselves till the day comes
so we maybe equipped with the skills to survive when we emerge independent from our shelters
to build another one
for ingrained deepest within our genes
is the desire to survive-sometimes even at the cost of others
and that maybe how evolution came about.
one basic genetic character.

but we seek love and companionship
for we too need evidence to prove our very own existence.
An irony, isn't it.
maybe the idea of self
is essentially the reflection of others interactions with us
but we want to determine the type of interaction,
henceforth the concept of appropriate behaviour
based on the assumption (proven or not) that the latter and former has a causal-effect relationship.

and more complications arise
like a recurrence relation
with each R(n) value contains part of the R(n-1) value.
making each complication similar as the previous and yet different at the same time.

ordered chaos

2008-07-28T06:45:00.000-07:00

chaos is order to be discovered.
or just randomnized order
if there's such a thing.

i need more time! and strength to stay focus and awake!

time

2008-07-26T07:01:00.000-07:00

will nothing good ever survive
the passing of time.
Do we have to die a hero
or live long to be deemed evil?
does everything turn sour
if left untouched but only admired.
do memories fade
when not mentioned
what about anguish and anger
do they fade away too?
or do they simmer below the surface
building up for a final eruption.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
its the time of the year again
will you dance with me
'neath the moonlit night
one last dance
before the whispers of goodbye
rustles through the trees
would you
pretty, please?

human vs animal

2008-07-26T04:05:00.000-07:00

not sure if i've said this before but

if we deem ourselves as above the animals
why do we constantly make comparison to them?
brave as a lion
agile as a monkey
big as an elephant
and the list goes on...
or even use them as tokens of power and status
a tiger's tooth
bear's skin.

is our so called 'dominance' just a facade
when deep within we fear them
hence these concrete walls and steel scaffolds
keepin them out of sight and hopefully thoughts altogether.

Still, this maybe a tad extreme
we maybe doing this out of respect
and admiration for their physique
and abilities.

If u truly think so,
look deeper within
Do your heart skip a sec faster
when u see just a crow flying towards you
or a dog strolling nearby even if its leashed.

If we really dont think ourselves as beneath them,
why the glory in bull fights?
why label those who fell beasts from lions to elephants as heroes?

respect for them?
yes that we truly have
but borne more out of fear than anything else.

some may truly love animals but they seem them more of equals
even so, a fear always linger
buried deep by their love now.
for Man fear the unknown.
that's a fact that will never change
be it the past, present or future. (now tis an absolute stand but this ain't GP!)

falling sick

2008-07-24T06:45:00.000-07:00

i'm fall
fallin' sick.
blocked nose.
sore throat-feels more like inflammation to me.
headache.

and there's econs case study tmr
along with ntu concept tests on sat which i've yet to revise on!
$20 gone just like that.
1 BIG sigh.

JFL
somehow, somewhere someone's missing me........
someone's cursing me..........
cos i keep sneezing! haha

going crazy

2008-07-24T04:34:00.000-07:00

there's a quiet sigh
that resounded through the campus
and people were awakened from that year long slumber
some are stretching their backs
other are rubbing their eyes...
but slowly bit by bit
everyone stiffened
and looked at the pile of notes lying in front
realisation followed by fear crossed their face
and with trembling hands they started to flip through the notes
as if under the lead of a conductor
hands flipped in unisons
notes rustled
and the MUGGING starts its melody.

but i've yet to be entranced by its beauty and that is really bad news. =(

enlightment

2008-07-20T06:45:00.000-07:00

yeah finally got enlightened!
i know why i dont feel well these past few weeks...
haven been exercising like before...body's so not used to it
feel so lethargic and grossed out la...
i need to run but there's no available timeslot!!
and bball and squash and study and sleep and rest
and just lie down...

a dull's ache there
for something's that lost
from memory and its place. =]

Food for thoughts

2008-07-16T06:32:00.001-07:00

when they say its time to wake up from dreams to reality.
it that true?
or just an excuse
to numb yourself from the dreamlike thrills
you felt in the real world out there?

maths test tmr.

SCREWED is when u have not prepared for it and still online
TOTALLY when u have seen people studying for it in school today..

rahh

i need a break! din even get to rest during the JUNES hols
well shall just make do and survive!

sometimes if our parent know fully of the stunts we have pulled (cycling in the dead of the night across half the country on a rented bike, dangerous encounters at bball courts, the falls, bloodied nose, injured wrist, thigh, calf, ankle, bruises to the chest and back, peeling of toe nails)
corny jokes we've shared
mean things we've done. (espmyjcyear)
they would be shocked beyond shock.

it's even funnier that our children (if we will do, thanks to successful baby-making policies)
would repeat such 'feats' again
and the cycle continues
different in contents
essentially same in pattern.

interhouse

2008-07-04T23:17:00.000-07:00

interhouse today!
rahh puma has a shortage of J2s for bball and vball!!!

anyways, 1 mth+ of abstinence from bball and training
has decreased my physical fitness by like 50%. shits la.
and even worse my shooting accuracy in a game is 0%! (this is like the dung of the dung!) none of my shots went in!
the 3 months of bballing from in nj during PAE has come to naught.
guess there's no such thing as retaining the skills despite not playing or training.
thankfully the lay-ups are not that bad but i must say it has deproved too =(
SADNESS if we won the last match, we would at least get a medal =P

oh well, here are the excuses. just recovered from my right ankle and calf injury. and my left wrist still feels weird.

alright vball, well i just played one game and technically i only did 1 good receive. and brandon aced like 10+ serves to win that game. and we finished third and second last for vball.
conclusion: there's a medal!

resolution: thou shalt not study everyday but include play too. and i would get my shooting accuracy back.

regrets and choices?

2008-07-04T06:30:00.000-07:00

sometimes, when we look back...
are there moments u wish u could have changed?
a lil bit more control
a lil bit more outgoing
a lil bit more understanding.

the steps we take
form impressions
on the wet cement
that hardens as time goes by
it may grow faint
but nevertheless it would still be there.

RIM

2008-07-02T07:36:00.000-07:00

the RIM's still far away.
heck, the board's a fingernail away.
net a finger away.
RIM light years away.
Darn. should have trained harder last year.
no time to do that this year.
with all the fats pumping activities like doing tutorials and studying.

want to know the ultimate culprit for fats?
mugging for exams and completing tutorials! =)

at this point of time

2008-06-29T06:50:00.000-07:00

at this point of time,
poly seems uber attractive!
despite the higher fianances needed
accruing to higher school fees
and higher living cost. =D

nah, i'm just kidding.
there are both merits and demerits.

oh no
a foreboding sense of RAIN!
another humid night. darn.

out of the blue

2008-06-28T08:00:00.000-07:00

A question which may never be fully answered:

Like a bolt of lightning out of the blue
everyone's caught off guard
and may have everything to lose.
the trust, the drive and the will to strive
for the thing we've all set out to do
would it all fall to naught
due to a single action
and the media's attitude?

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
and tis is not an emo post!
only those who knew would know.

jokes

2008-06-23T05:57:00.001-07:00

was walking home listening to the radio.... and these are snippets from what the Dj said.
he was quoting some ex-actor anyway. ex is in the literal sense.

"as one gets older, one reads more of the bible. just like when students are cramming for the exams."
"i know why santa is such a jolly man, he has a list of the names of naughty girls"

sadly that's all i could remember. made me laugh like an idiot while walking past people la!

test

2008-06-19T07:35:00.000-07:00

i seriously dont feel like studying... NO mood.
this is a bad sign...i dun want a repeat of my report. must Ace it all the way!
rah! but all i can think of is sports and magic....
Sighs...
what the heart seeks
the mind refuse
what the mind wants
the heart ignores

managed to do half a maths paper today.
conclusion: worrying. my mind seems to be distracted. by what i dunno?
need some stimulus to get me back to mugging mode.
an irony in fact, considering what education institution i'm in and what past experience i have.
guess i'm not mature enough. =(

back

2008-06-17T05:58:00.000-07:00

back from sjab camp! hahas am too tired.... Some of us(ex-ncos) din sleep throughout the whole camp. =P then the next morning while waiting to give lessons...there were some rest time. that's went the problem started! once u get some shut-eye, a few minutes would not suffice!

but well, at least for campfire all the 9 generations were represented. come next year and maybe we would be able to hit 10 generations! haha..that would like be like 10 year difference between the sec1s next year and guo jian's batch!!!

think i injure my left wrist last evening while shooting hoops again...darn i hate old injuries. and somehow i sprained the middle finger of my left hand...this sux to the core. okays just had my 2-3 hrs nap, energised for the next few hours.. mugging starts tomorrow. Operation-surviving mid-years! please let me have the strength and time and focus to finish studying physics and maths tmr!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
the mistakes dont matter
since they are already committed.
complains dont matter
as everything's happened.
its time to look back upon the footpath created
and remember the stumbling blocks faced
then to pick oneself up and together as a team continue one's journey
through the passage of time.

--------

2008-06-15T06:46:00.000-07:00

what's the most presumed concept in the world?
the basis of everything...

is it the logic that there is always a cause and effect???

what if things just happen? =)

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
what's to be feared is not the dark
nor the guns or bombs
its the souls wielding those
that we have to be aware of
and what really beats deep within our heart.

truth at last! =X

2008-06-10T06:13:00.000-07:00

Finally after a year plus...the truth behind zy's wai yu from ws...
the answer to the mystery is dervied form the fact that ws fail station 6!
hahsa kidding eh
but its still funny!! hahaa

oh and for some reasons, the doc had problem pumping out my blood?
too fat!?
and i actually was afraid that the needle would break....
that was till i saw him took a metal needle out....and poke it onto my skin.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
are male and females opposites
or derivatives of one another?
maybe they are halves of each other...
then are they specific?
or their active sites are changeable....
but that means that they can separate themselves too?

friends

2008-06-09T18:46:00.000-07:00

.od ot hcum os evah i tub .derit os gnileef
sith gniod m'i taht derob os m'i tub.
[= !yrtne siht gnidear rof syug uoy era os

another day wasted going to CMPB tmr,
sighhs could have used it to catch up on my studies.
ISD-i'm so dead.

and squashing the day after tmr! wahaha. if the plan's still on. =]

kung fu panda

2008-06-07T07:26:00.000-07:00

okay...bbq with squash ppl yester night.
must say the j1s are really enthu..haha
too bad coach arrived late....
busy guy...just arrived at s'pore then need to fly off the next day!

anywya..intended to pool but it was full so it was mid night movie-kungfu panda
afterwhich, both huidan and ruiyan went high for no apparent reason.

well the movie's hilarious but short...and we waited nearly 10mins to watch a 10sec clip at the end of the movie!? rahh haha

but left with these phrase in mind:
yesterday's history
tomorrow's a mystery
and today's a gift
that's why its called the present....

a cliche...but still, its nice!

Q&A

2008-06-05T08:05:00.000-07:00

someone asked me....
'squash can see one meh?'

how should i answer?

0615am tmr.... wth. waking up so early just to play squash against some ppl. ttwot. this would not have happened if ............................................................

okay. done complaining. shalt continue tmr.

alright last comm training and bball session with sjabians for a long long time....except maybe this coming camp in june..

art of words

2008-06-01T07:58:00.000-07:00

scribble scrabble scrape scratch scramble score scraw call croak crone croach coat cone cope pope load toad moat poke Laughing Out Loud ____________________

do u see the art within?

anguish, sadness, hope, craziness, chaos, white death

worst evening ever.... totally bored la...aaron why din u come along, spiky why did you have additional work!? WC y u at M'sia?! WX MIA gillian too lazy to come out....... -_-

sat

2008-05-31T07:11:00.000-07:00

and i've yet to rest. been bballing, squashing training jnrs, skipping lunches
everything but study! rahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

staying out late with sjabians, nie gang and FONGs (friends of nie gang, coined by aaron) at kfc, mac.

finding coach's present, blogging and also IHSC (inter house squash competition) too!

seems ages since i've been listening and using the comp. am i a cyber addict? haha

btw, learnt how to use the note function in my phone to display when on stnadby.... -_-
---------------------------------------

i'm tired with eyes shutting
but the brain says no
and the heart's feeling empty
while the hand's free
to point out to the night
beyond the panes of glass
while the crickets sing
leaves rustle
and the legs yearn for a run.....

today

2008-05-29T18:56:00.000-07:00

SQUASH SJAB BBALL TODAY

i must say..i'm still tired. have yet to spend one whole day at home to sleep!

aye, tis naught thy time to sleep,
thou shalt work, sweat and bleed
to reap the fruits of labour
in the seasons that cometh

back from camp

2008-05-28T05:50:00.000-07:00

AM BACK! hahas...well tis sorta of mixed feelings...

relieved that the camp is over, yet miss my group a lil- BLACKFOOT! and VG1! hahas...
both groups are enthusiastic and yet have different team dynamics. although must say VG1 is quite challenging to facilitate... BTW, very sorry i couldn't send you guys off, was helping out admin committee.

and blackfoot! thanks for ur replies! hahaa` i did not had a chance to say this but we had a really good trek....none of you had to fall out and you guys completed it in good time despite the hippcups.(did i spell that correctly?)

and YEEAAHH! its sad that the SI guy bunks wont get together to sleep thru the nite again...haha the inside jokes we had, the weird antics the juniors had like inspector SHAAM or instructor mugilan! hahaas

but it was really tiring, had to grab snatches of naps in between, actually just during the bus rides...

okays, i'm like dozing in and out...shall blog more next time. Till then`

doctor

2008-05-22T22:42:00.001-07:00

need to see the doc and get that bugging lump thing removed. rahhhh. wish me luck. haha

AB camp later. hopes it goes smoothly...

econs

2008-05-19T05:24:00.000-07:00

oh no i wasted today din study econs and i'm gg to watch bball on thurs.... -__-
i need help in the form of intelligence and perseverance!!

magic

2008-05-18T06:56:00.000-07:00

magic.

when performed to the kids.
their smiles and laughters are all worth it
to see their happiness for that few minutes
and their belief of magic come true.

but as the age group goes up.
to impress is the goal.
to mystify...
there's still smiles....because they are impressed
laughters are heard more for the antics and skill than the magic itself.

if only they can be made to believe in that, even for that few seconds.
whence their imagination goes wild and free from the vices of reality.
to believe in the impossible...

- -

Friday

2008-05-16T07:05:00.000-07:00

faced off TJ today, well can see that all our fitness have dropped since we have stopped training and the strokes too. at least not everyone got trashed and we only lost 4-1. but we could have win i feel if our grouping is right. but wells..... summore with mao kun already injured and low morale in the team, thanks to exams and the stupid incident, it was quite an okay performance i guess.

but i must say our refs are very....hahas maybe its just the accent. =] we had a good laugh anyway at them and ourselves.

best thing today! got to play bball! haha with ppl not as demanding as other area de...basically more friendly? and the playing style is abit different. more shooters here. well, the hoop is definitely much more larger in my opinion. or issit just a perception? played till legs cramp. been long since this happens...haha. cramping in mid-air! hahas and my shooting has degenerated to a sucky level... =( lay-ups too but at least they arn't that bad.

jump jumP juMP jUMP JUMP HIGHER!
99% shooting accuracy

and all SPA are finally officially over!

Question

2008-05-10T06:34:00.000-07:00

What do you want in life?
To be free.
Simple.
No.
+++++++++++++++++
simple, a complex thing itself.
for things have to be accomplished,
goals reached
by simplicity itself.
but that's impossible
when there's so many to consider.

[A balanced answer....
there are good points to it too.]

from simple things are great ideas thought
simple actions that hearts are moved.
simple words that make tears flow
of love, gratitude, hate or fear.

#Rad-
To completely obliterate self-centeredness, we have to lose the sense of self.
are you ready to do that?
To live for the world
for people you dont know
just so the world continues.

We seek order from chaos
thus came music from sounds
then arrived speech from garbled noises
followed by drawings from scribblings
seperating words from drawings
friends from strangers.
You and I.
finally we try to combine them
while retaining their distinctiveness
(i seriously have no idea what's this about and my head's aching)

words

2008-05-03T07:03:00.000-07:00

words are powerful things.
Despite its standardised meaning in the oxford dictionary
it means differently to each of us.
the values it hold within us
differs from you and me.
the emotions it invokes varies

but they are the best substitute available
for us to express ourselves.
or not.

sometimes a hug is all we need or a pat on the back.
words are luxury meant to be used consciously
not fluanted extravagantly.

many a times we speak what we mean not
only to regret it
and seek ways to rectify it.

but what's done is done. there's no going from 1 to 0 but 1 to 2 and more.

"its better to be silent and look like a fool than open your mouth and prove so."

I

2008-04-24T06:24:00.000-07:00

when you speak
within yourself
how does 'I' look like
am I big or small?
confident or weak?
is it the same I all the time
or do I change now and then?
---------------------------------------------------------------------
there's never equilibrium as we understand it to be
but seemingly equilibrium
whereby events and feelings are in continuous movement
----------------------------------------------------------------------

i'm getting weaker
i can feel it
and i don't like it one bit!
bball deprived! =[
the sky's dark and heavy
and air's thick and choking.
+\/nauseous\/+

in the end

2008-04-23T06:59:00.000-07:00

Despite all the complexities
in human interaction
of cheating, teasing and praising.
they are part and parcel of
finding and building upon
our relationships
for a person
who understands and listens
to one's complains
and just be there when needed.

i'm claming up.
and i know it
strangely i'm enjoying it.
i dont wanna history repeated.
yet i dream of the possible days ahead.

LOLLIPOP.

Squash

2008-04-20T06:20:00.000-07:00

A recent piece of news came to my ears
and i dont know what to make of it.
squash competition is suspended.

guess, its abt what lit tat mentioned on sat. to think such things will happen...

'All's fair in war'?
'Sports is war minus the bullets'

operation

2008-04-18T06:53:00.000-07:00

okays this was basically how he did it (my point of view)

put some eyedrops that number my eye or i think is the blinking or sth...
then use the sharp point of a scissors to sort of dig out those two pimple like thing from the inner eyelid
then it was light compress to stop the bleeding. =]

with luck and care it will recover...

not well

2008-04-17T07:11:00.000-07:00

blisters on my hands,
a swollen eye
scrapped (lightly) left knee,
aching calfs.

on the contrary,
they arn't that bad.
but the eye's irritating!

Inspired to aspire
for A's
there arn't any other choices left anyway.

the best moments are usually known after its over.
then regrets set it
followed by blaming
building a home for depression to stay.

rAnTs

2008-04-14T05:30:00.000-07:00

5 more days it coming soon. din know its so soon....
bye bye 17 hello 18...
but i dun wanna grow old
neither do i want status quo.

X more days and that would be 3 mths ago.

X+3 more days and all the sweat, blood and injuries sustained would come to naught.
Lesson learnt: Going at 90% is not enough if success is what u want. 110% would be what you need to have at least a 50% probability of success. sacrifices would have to be made. Standards set, Will steeled and Actions to realise it.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
will friendships (n) stand high up throughout its solitude
or will it be eroded by the sands of time?
the latter seems to stand true as n tends to infinity...

but

2008-04-12T06:54:00.000-07:00

education and ccas?

there's no choice but to move on
for tis a one way street.
no excuse to fall down
on this well paved road.
others may have cars
to travel down the streets
professional guides to navigate through the crowd
but what we have are legs and everyone else
trying to fight the crowd
and reach our destinations
shadowed by sign boards of bright neon lights.

'you did not lose to him or anyone else, you have only lost to yourself '